How To Save Minnesota's Congressional Butt.

What loser.

Here I am posting on Christmas morning about the potential for Minnesota to lose one of its eight Congressional seats if our population falls short in the upcoming Census. State forecasts show us missing the mark by about 1,100 people – a difference of less than one month’s population change.

King Banaian notes this, along with a discussion we had in 2008 about how and why Minnesota's population growth is slowing. He suggests he might have a student investigate the question as a senior project.

I'd welcome that analysis.

That got me thinking, though. Why not some senior projects on ways Minnesota could avoid losing the seat?

We might have to take action sooner than a student could write a paper, so I'll offer some of my own solutions to legislators, too. I've tried to make suggestions that could appeal to either party:

1. Enrich Minnesota health care and supplemental income programs for the poor to attract more people from Chicago
   
2. "Rent" 2,000 surplus unemployed South Dakotans and make them Pipestone residents for the duration of the Census
3. Annex Hudson, Wisconsin. In addition to boosting the Minnesota population, it will relieve residents who commute to jobs in Minnesota from having to file two income tax returns, although those still working in Wisconsin would be out of luck
4. Offer a free building and infrastructure improvements, with no property or corporate income taxes payable until 2080, to any business that can relocate its workforce here by spring (wait, that's what other states already do)
5. Bring major league soccer to St. Paul and watch the economy blossom
6. Send Minnesota peacekeeping troops to Missouri, another state on the Congressional district cusp. Leaflet the state with anti-Census propaganda, and t0 be safe, have Rep. Michele Bachmann tour the Ozarks in person
7. Outlaw abortion in Minnesota
8. Put Johnny Crumbles and his associates from Atlantic City in charge of staffing the Minnesota Census effort
9. Encourage tax cheaters to declare their phantom dependents on their Census forms, too
10. The comments are open...