Across the Great Divide

Confessions of a Mole.

It's time to tell the truth.

Yes, I'm a mole.

For five years, I have worked, mostly diligently, to convince you that some conservatives were indeed interested in building a decent world. Now that we've won and the first all-Minnesota presidential ticket is destined for the White House in 2012 — if not sooner — I might as well stop living a lie.

I left a cushy job creating marketing messages for corporate America to become a fake liberal blogger. This job was even cushier — fewer client meetings and working at home — and I took a nice salary bump.

There were drawbacks, of course. I had to quit the golf club. I had to sell the Jag and bike everywhere, even in the winter. Distasteful as it was, I disrespected my political heroes and said some very harsh things about certain political operatives. Now that they run the party, I hope they will remember my mission and treat me kindly. A communications directorship would be nice, with maybe a little side job as an election judge.

I had to attend Drinking Liberally, at least until I seriously relapsed and my bosses put me in rehab. I called it "Colorado." When it appeared my cover might be blown late last year, I started volunteering in homeless shelters.

All that was miserable, but I pressed on for the greater — though not necessarily majority — good.

My only real friend through all this was Jeff, who kept my spirit company here. He did a masterful job of walking the line between a reasonable conservative, an annoying libertarian and the whacko that all of you fear and detest.

Then Wilford Wicklund outed me. Oh, he was sly and I tried to respond with an equally sly comment. But I don't think I was that convincing. Finally, I should start being honest with myself again.

I have a meeting with my handlers this morning. I'm going to tell them my plan to come clean — that I'll lay everything out here. There may be water boarding, to make sure I wasn't a double mole. If they don't let me out alive, no matter.

I've already time-posted the story, and it will appear here, while I either head for the mountains or begin eternity with my savior.

Pawlenty's Stock: Headed Underwater.

Politics is the only profession where it's considered okay to badmouth the competition. And if you're out looking for another job, you don't tell your boss you have a dentist appointment — you go on television.

Silly me. I used to think being a governor was an executive job.

If I was still running a company and it was having trouble, I'd find a way to get to the office each day and spend time with my management team. When I went out, it would be to talk to my customers and buck up the people doing the work under tough circumstances.  

Even if I was planning to jump ship, I certainly wouldn't be spending all my time talking about what a crappy job my colleagues had done, and then take credit for their accomplishments that I'd tried to stop. As Gov. Pawlenty has noted, after all, there's Google.

But our Gov. Pawlenty has been going the other way — slamming the cities he's shafted, taking credit for good stuff he opposed and canceling funding that doesn't exist. If state government were a private company, a hostile takeover would be under way by now. Sell advisories would be issued. 

But recall is for Californians.

Pawlenty's greatest accomplishments over the past three months have been to make ex-Gov. Palin look like she has integrity for resigning and make Rep. Michele Bachmann look like a normal Minnesota Republican.

*****

Norwegianity reads about efforts to block middle- and lower-income people who might receive federal insurance subsidies from using the money on health care plans that cover abortion and has this to say:

This is not about abortion, it’s about control freaks legislating their religious twaddle. Next will be AIDS exclusion (unholy lifestyle, etc.), then STD exclusion in general. Then they’ll go after the obese. It’s almost funny to see how the right uses that one both ways: Obama will force you to be healthy (nanny state) vs. Why should I have to pay higher rates because some people choose to be fat (laissez fuck-u-ism).

Anything to slow down the eventual bill because the entire Republican party has become little more than the Gotta Obstruct Party.

It’s like Middle Eastern terrorism. First you set off a small bomb, then you set off the bigger bomb when the ambulances arrive. Republicans break everything, then snipe at the repair crews.

What Would JesusCare Do?

Square State asks — and answers: What if Jesus were an HMO?

After Jesus heals the blind Bartimaeus and others, the JesusCare Call Center administers the claims:

"Well, give me a second while I look that up...ahhh, OK, I understand what happened. You see, I did perform the eye treatment, but your policy requires you to be referred by your Primary Care Physician for any specialist treatment and pre-approved by someone here at Customer Care before we can be liable for any costs of care, and the computer says that you didn't do any of that first...so, I apologize, but we won't be able to make any adjustments to this account."

Where Will Tax-Loving Liberals Strike Next?

Phil Krinkie of the Taxpayers League of Minnesota takes offense at suggestions our Absentee Overlord's no-new-taxes pledge might underlie the state's budget problems.

The explanation for why Minnesota has such dire budget problems is always, “It’s Gov. Pawlenty’s steadfast commitment not to raise taxes.” This is what the tax-and-spenders point to as the underlying cause of Minnesota’s budget problems.

So, as the left starts to crank up their propaganda against the term “no new taxes,” let’s set the record straight.

With, of course, some tax-and-spender propaganda of his own. Krinkie claims "tax increases are a way of life in Minnesota" because Republican Governors Al Quie and Arne Carlson saw a need to raise taxes in past decades.

Krinkie goes on to enumerate other increases, always careful to roll up the pennies, nickles and dollars that individual taxpayers might pay into billions of dollars of shared burden counted up over decades.

Krinkie wants government to live within its means, which is not a bad request on the face of it. But it requires a certain amount of cooperation from the taxpayers who demand services and the marketplace that provides them. 

Otter Tail County’s cost for buying salt this winter is expected to increase by 29 percent, shocking Highway Engineer Rick West and leaving commissioners wondering if there were alternatives.

How much the Highway Department spends on salt will affect how much road construction is completed the following summer. If the department goes over what is budgeted, that amount is taken out of the budget for road construction, West explained.

I doubt Otter Tail County is run by tax-loving liberals, but officials there may soon go on Krinkie's watch list if they try too hard to solve the problem.

West said he suspects the increase in cost was caused by a consolidation in vendors.

In other words, the free market wants a tax increase.

Do as I Say, Not as I Do.

At the Michigan state Republican leadership conference on Mackinac Island Saturday, Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty said people living in traditional Democratic strongholds such as Detroit often hold the cliched view that the GOP is a party of elitists.

Um, no. They just hold the cliched view that Republicans don't care about black people.

But never mind that. Pawlenty thinks the GOP needs to reach out to inner city voters — sort of like he has in Minnesota.

How Far We've Fallen.

Two views on paying for health care. From a Republican I voted for and from one I didn't.

Yum.

Beating Swords into Paper.

Untitled, Jon LaFalce
Pulp printing on combat paper

I've had a busy week and am feeling unpeaceful right now for missing most of A Week for Peace at Minnesota Center for Book Arts that brought in the Combat Paper Project and the Warrior Writers Project.

The Combat Paper Project collaborates with local groups like MCBA and Susan Hensel Gallery to sponsor papermaking workshops, where local veterans are given the opportunity to use uniforms worn in combat to create cathartic works of art.

The uniforms are cut up, beaten into fiber and formed into sheets of paper. Later, text and imagery created by veterans are printed on the sheets. The goal is to use art to help individuals reconcile their personal experiences and challenge traditional narratives surrounding service, honor and military culture.

Some of the work is headed for the Carleton College Art Gallery, October 22nd through November 18, 2009.

Sen. Kyl Wants Freedom to Choose What Insurance Covers.

Sen. John Kyl of Arizona remarked in a Senate Finance Committee this week that he does not need maternity care.

By his estimation, he should be free to seek insurance coverage that does not mandate maternity coverage. He thinks this would make his policy cost less.

I'm sure the insurance lobby would like him to think so.

Sen. Kyle is probably correct about his low need for maternity care. He is likely beyond his child siring years, too. But he is not necessarily beyond sharing the costs of maternity coverage, because that's how insurance works. It spreads some of the risk to other people who are less likely to have claims of a certain type.

A health care policy on a 67-year-old male will likely rate him higher for heart disease, dementia and other conditions for which a young woman seeking maternity coverage will pose a much lower risk. Her young husband has a greater risk of accidental injury. And Kyl's wife is at greater risk for cancer and osteoporosis. 

If the young woman's insurance plan does not include coverage for the one condition most likely to require health care, why should she buy insurance at all? And if she doesn't, grampa Kyl's premiums are bound to go up.

Kyl does not like to be confused by the facts — such as too much information about the comparative effectiveness of disease treatments.

When he opposed Pres. Obama's nomination of Kathleen Sebelius for Secretary of Health and Human Services, Kyl said an evidence-based approach to medicine, coupled with information on price, could lead to rationing of care.

And that would be bad — especially for old farts like Sen. Kyl.

Beer and Karma.

After going on a field trip with the shelter kids to Underwater World at Mall of America this morning and knocking off some work for a nonprofit all afternoon, tonight I enjoyed a beer tasting sponsored by my favorite retailer comparing Oktoberfest brews. (My choices: Surlyfest, Avery The Kaiser Imperial Oktoberfest, Summit Oktoberfest, New Belgium Hoptoberfest and Flying Dog Dogtoberfest.)

In a raffle that benefited the local food shelf, we avoided winning all the beer paraphernalia and came home with the $40 liquor store gift certificate, thus indicating my karma is still in force. Of course, it helps to have purchased a fistful of tickets.

I ran into an old business acquaintance there who I hadn't seen for about five years. When we owned our businesses, we served as board members for each other's companies. He had recently returned from three years in India with his family, where his wife made India safe for Target, and he worked as a volunteer with India's marginal non-profits, trying to help them get funding.

We also learned they had a fecund pear tree in the yard that was disgorging fruit at an alarming rate. We were invited to stop by later and take home one of several five-gallon buckets  sitting on their porch, filled with water to keep away the wasps.

So we did. Reaching home, I made the rounds of the neighbors. It says something about our neighborhood that everyone answered the door on a dark Thursday night and welcomed a man in a windbreaker with a plastic bucket in one hand and Oktoberfest fumes on his breath.

Earlier this week, I made a beet, pear and feta salad that required me to purchase one Bartlett pear at the grocery store. Out of the hundreds of regular shaped pears, I found one that was almost suitably ripe.

Tonight, I came home with half a bucket of less perfectly formed fruit. In fact, you couldn't sell a one of them.

The photo shows less than half a bucket because some have already been devoured before bedtime. Had I tasted them first, I'm not sure I would have made the neighborhood circuit.

I suspect there are many lessons embedded in all this, and I am confident my readers are capable of extracting them. However, you will have to do it without tasting any of my pears.